At the age of 32, I am telling others for the first time about the secret I have kept since Junior High.
I have an eating disorder.
There is this look of shock in their eyes.
“I didn’t know.”
“I wouldn’t have guessed that about you.”
Ms P made sure no one knew about ED. My perfectionism tells me I have to have it all together, so why would I tell or show anyone I have a mental health illness.
Some of the people I am telling have known me my whole life.
Only a small handful of individuals knew about my shameful secret. Let’s be honest here, I didn’t realize I had an eating disorder for a good portion of my life.
If you would have told me three years ago, I would be telling family/friends and writing a blog, I would have been horrified and said that's impossible.
How could I tell others about ED? I was the good Christian girl who was supposed to have it all together, get good grades, and be voted most likely to succeed in high school.
I have been so encouraged by the love and support I have received since I started sharing about ED. Many people tell me about someone they know who has been affected by an eating disorder. This doesn't mean people have always said the right thing, but I choose to believe their intentions are good.
I feel empowered when I tell people. It’s a victory in the battle against ED. Sharing my story has been so important because it takes the secret into the light where he doesn't have the same control over me.